Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Faincy Don't Let Me Down

Sorry for the recent silence. This has been for two reasons: 1. my life is very boring right now, and 2. my hormones recently turned me into a crazy person so I have been avoiding contact with all sentient beings except my husband who can't escape my hormonal wrath because six months ago he said a few vows, among them the one that goes "I will love you forever even when your hormones turn you into a crazy person." There was also a vow in there about taking me to get ice cream whenever I want it. Anytime, night or day.

So in lieu of anything insightful (like I ever post anything that could be considered insightful here) I now present to you a brief lexicon of Southern vernacular--or at least my take on it.

For the most part, people who don't know that I grew up in a relatively small town in Alabama wouldn't be able to guess it from hearing me speak. I spent my whole life purposefully trying to mute my own accent, and for the most part I've been successful, but there are a few times when the whole sham comes crumbling down at my feet. Here are some incidents:

1. But-cept. When Dominic first head this one he hit the floor laughing so hard I thought he was going to fall through it. But-cept is a combination of the words but and except. I use it if I'm feeling particularly tired or distracted. Ex: I had to go the bathroom really bad but-cept I didn't want to because there were only porta-potties there and they were stinky.

2. Hongry. Again, this word only comes out of my mouth this way when I'm tired or distracted or, well, incredibly hongry. I asked Dominic if he was hongry once, and he gave me this look of utter disdain and moral superiority and told me that never in his entire life had he ever been or would ever be "hongry." Ex: Dominic is not nice when he makes fun of me for being hongry.

3. Faincy. This is a word I use to describe anything I own that is nice. I usually limit its usage to shoes, clothing, and accessories, but I sometimes add the word, pants, at the end of it to broaden the word to describe, well, anything. Ex: Boy, those shoes are faincy! I'm going to wear them tomorrow to the faincy-pants party downtown.

4. Pin. Ex: Hand me that pin. I need to write something down.

Also, remember the cat-hat? She was back last night. Only this time she wasn't so much on my head as COMPLETELY STRETCHED OUT IN MY SPOT IN BED. I made the tragic mistake last night of rolling over a little in my sleep toward the center of the bed, and then when I tried to roll back, the cat yelled at me for disturbing her sleep. SHE WAS USING MY PILLOW AND EVERYTHING.

I guess it doesn't matter so much because she is after all just a wee little thing and I could easily just push her off the bed, but Mia has attitude. And when she meow-yells at me there is so much angry indignation packed into her little cat-voice that I feel like I have to comply or I'll be really really sorry. So I usually just let her do whatever. I guess she's like a teenager that way, except furrier and stupider. Also, she licks her butt a lot.

2 Comments:

Blogger Audra said...

I still say all long i's "ah." That's one I can't let go. Actually, I embrace my southern heritage and I actually try to hang on to it. But I know it makes me sound stupider!

4:11 PM  
Blogger QOS said...

i've actually become a huge fan of my southern accent since i left the south.

10:22 AM  

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